Some of the things that were hanging over my head have been finally resolved, but, there’s more to do.
Everything out of the mess of a closet I wanted out is now out, a lot of stuff has been donated now.
Every unnecessary monthly charge is gone, Netflix, the Funny Music Project, Devo Spice’s Spice Rack, Decoder Ring Theatre. Some will come back, but, there are some things that really need to be done first. Such as my lifetime ARRL membership payments over the last three years needs to be finished. It was supposed to be quarterly but I paid it when I could pay it. I was on a payment plan, and as of this month, I have three payments left to complete it. I also will probably join Toastmasters like Cheri is when she has the time. That’s another thing to pay for, that I need to work into my budget.
God bless Cheri she’s been working overtime for the last month, on top of troubles with school and various other things. She surprised me Friday, out of the blue she showed up at my door. She’s amazing, and like I said to my mom on the phone, I want to be the best version of myself that I can for her.
I’ve also been trying to save for some ham radio gear for about the last year and am over half-way there. Want to get that done too. I messed up on that once and had to start over, because I spent way too much and needed that money.
This week I am stretching my money out, so I can take care of a few things and still have enough for when Cheri is free to take her out on a date she deserves. She’s been great, cooks me dinner sometimes, pays when we go out. I know she does that out of the kindness of her heart, because she wants to, but sometimes I feel bad, because I am the guy here, I should really be the one paying for dinner. I bought pizza for her and the minion last week, but it still feels like it’s not good enough, but I often feel that way about a lot of things, like I can’t be good enough, even at work sometimes I feel that way.
Getting the things hanging over my head out of the way, and being more responsible with my spending, these are things that have to be done, but I am not just doing it for me, I am planning for a possible future. I want her to see, I won’t be like the men in her past, or, like she’s raising another kid.
Remember, before, I said 2012 would be a year for change? It has, it has big time, but I’ve realized there’s more that must be done, and it’s going to take some time. I just hope everyone in my life can be patient with me.