That was epic fail…or was it?

This time, trying to do the right thing, and not jump the gun. I lost a chance I had. FOR NOW. Time to be the loyal, good and true guy friend, really, just as I always am.

2012 a year for personal change too, this time, IT’S FOR REALZ!

To the three people that have read my blog for some time. (truth be told it’s probably more like zero) I have from time to time let lose a bit of personal stories, a window to my own life so to speak. As a bit of an update, for about a year or so I have been living in my own converted apartment, which is like a townhouse or a condo. A close friend has been living with me as well, he did move out for a few months for various reasons, but he is back again, as is my thing to do, I will nickname him Navy Boy, since like Army Boy/Former Army, he was military.  Navy Boy over the last couple of months, introduced me to a friend of his he met at a bar. Since she appears to like wearing my Jayne hat when she’s in my car, I will call her, Hat Girl.  Hat Girl, I find to be fascinating, and as they say, truth be told, I think I have a bit of a crush. Now those that know me, know it’s not THAT hard for me to wind up doing that, and usually such things either don’t go anywhere, or they end in failure, because I was motivated too much by the crush, and didn’t really realize the person I was crushing on wasn’t worth my time.  Yeah, I just had my 33rd birthday yesterday and I still have crushes.  I think everybody does, although they don’t admit it, I bet she does, but one of them probably is not me.  Some of my crushes just generally don’t see me that way, or I am not the type they look for, which in a lot of cases is actually a good thing, because it saves me from making a horrible mistake, and like I said, I have made a few.

This new friend, Hat Girl, I find fascinating, because she is kind, sweet and outgoing, and she appears to be an honest person too. A good friend to keep around really, if she’ll keep me around, with all the texting I did the last couple of days, and  my silliness, she would say that I am weird, and I called her different, though she didn’t get it, and asked my point, I often have trouble expressing myself, and so I fumbled and explained that I didn’t even know what my point is. Having had a discussion with a friend later, call him Gator Boy, I realize, that we are ALL weird in some way.  Hat Girl at the very least, likes me as a friend, and that is perfectly perfect because, really all I want is friends, friends before all else, and knowing of my bad decisions, maybe that’s the best thing for me.

I find her fascinating, and amazing (which I told her she’s amazing) because of what makes her, well, different. There are certainly some things about her that are familiar, and things that are not, we are all unique in our own way, but certain aspects of our personalities can be similar. We do have things in common, such as Weird Al, and things that are grape flavored.  Where as she likes horror movies, I am a sci-fi and fantasy nut. Now, the three do collide at times, so that’s cool, and I don’t necessarily hate horror films, although I generally do not chose to watch them, unless someone else makes that decision and I am just along for the ride.

I look forward to seeing where this goes, hope she’ll want to hang out with me again, we’ll see after my weird self  messed up, and possibly said way too much, although she sas “Ur cool babe”, I have been lied too about such things before. There is a point, where some things I say or do, I get carried away, she even caught me once when I said “shutup” and told me I needed “to be a little nicer” and she was correct.